“Your task is not to seek for love, but merely to seek and find all the barriers within yourself that you have built against it.”- Rumi
The word ‘Love’ is always associated with how you feel about others and how others make you feel. However, love is more than giving presents and hugs. Love is also more than flowers, chocolates and expensive dining. Love is a way of life and as a mummy no doubt your heart is filled with it unconditionally for your children. No matter how old the children get or how many miles far apart, a mother will always love them beyond words can express.
However, have you heard about self-love?
“Self-love: (noun) regard for one’s own wellbeing and happiness.”
As mothers we are almost programmed to put the happiness of our children (and family) before our own. Yet, sacrificing one’s own happiness is not what makes a ‘good’ mother. A mother needs to place importance to herself, practice self-love and care for herself, because that’s the recipe for a ‘happy’ mother. And this ‘happy’ mother will in return create a loved, secure and happy environment at home for her family. This ‘happy’ mother teaches her children that you can gain happiness by loving yourself.
As a daughter, I have heard my mum complain about the odd few wrinkles and the minor weight gain, though I have also seen how my dad looks at my mum after she dresses up for special occasions. She radiates beauty and that’s because she gives importance to the way she looks. She takes the time out to adorn herself with sparkly jewellery and find the perfect shoes to go with the outfit. When she is happy with herself, it makes dad feel happy and us children feel even happier. It’s that simple, really.
Now that I’m a mother myself, I would like to see the same for Azmu. I want her to see that her mother is happy and comfortable in her own skin.
This Valentine’s day, spend a few moments telling yourself how much you love ‘you’.
Love your body, despite the weight gain, for it has held a tiny human for 9 long months and continues to feed milk to the tiny miracle.
Love your stretch marks across your tummy, despite daily olive oil massages, for it is proof of your courage to bring life into this world.
Love your tired eyes due to sleepless nights, for it tells that the comfort of your baby is more important than your sleep.
Love your chapped lips due to the nervous biting, for it shows that you were worried when your baby was crying and you didn’t know how to console her.
Love your sore arms from all the carrying her around, because one day she will outgrow those arms.